Saturday, November 29, 2008

Why should I post a title? What have titles ever done for me?

Hey Hey Hey! The dreaded hour is upon us. The computer is on, the night has come, the moon is full, the terror awaits, for i am about to POST on my blog! So run while you still can, but don't bother hiding. My post will find you! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Sooooo......Ya.....I feel another awkward silence coming on. 

Moving right along now...

I hope you're ready cause i'm about to post about my Thanksgiving, cause i'm sure you guys haven't read enough posts about that. 

Thanksgiving. A day of giving thanks. How appropriate. It is a day of family, a day of grace, a day of peace. It is a day to eat our fill, a day to share our fill, and a day to fill out ones waistline. It's a great holliday, one that represents generosity, peace, and thankfullness. God has blessed us and we thank him.

On the whole, i enjoy Thanksgiving quite a bit, but I don't like what it sometimes represents for my family. You see, I have A LOT *note cap locks. they are used to represent emphasis, so ya know, EMPHASIZE a lot. Do it!* of family problems. Luckily, they lie mainly in our extended family. Unfortunately, this makes Thanksgiving a very small gathering for my immediate family. Just my mom, dad, sis,our two dogs (you have to include the dogs. Even when i do interviews for charity work and they ask about my fam, i ALWAYS *theres that emphasis again* mention my dogs!) and myself. Everyone else in our extended fam goes to my grandma's house. We can't go because my aunt, (my mom's sister) was absolutely horrid to my mom growing up. It got to the point where now my mom has to take anxiety pills months in advanced when she knows she has to see her. It's that bad. It puts a heavy strain on our family, especially since now my aunt has cancer. Bad cancer. We get along with most everyone else in our family, even my druggie , abusive uncle who is starting to fix himself up thank goodness. 

Also, my family can't all be in the same room without the threat of world war III breaking lose. Seriously, i'm surprised we haven't become a threat to national security yet with how vicious my fam gets when they start arguing! They are so narrow minded and self-righteous at times. That's also why they don't like me. I speak my mind and my mind doesn't always agree with theirs. And i don't like telling my mind to shut up cause then my mind gets mad at me and gives me the cold shoulder until I send it flowers.

Honestly, i don't mind not being with the rest of the family that much for the reason they ignore me the best they can without being too blatant about it. They will start conversations with my sister, but should i dare speak i get a "O, you. Why are you still here?" glare. It would be nice if we could be a bit more united, but aw well. They're the Soviet Union and We're Switzerland. Not enemies, but also not best buds. Thankfully my uncle and aunt from Alaska visited us, so that was nice.


The atmosphere at my house was relaxed and comfortable. We all just cooked all day, laughing at each other and enjoying the tantalizing aroma of the roasting turkey. It was a great day, despite that guilty "we should be at grandmas house with everyone else" feeling we all had. The best (and most important part!) was the food! 

Our specials of the night were:

Roasted Turkey, stuffed with a unique and sensational cranberry stuffing.

Homemade Gnocchi (a delicous and textural Italian potato dumpling) topped with a traditional red sauce

Eggplant parmesana, topped with a rich, flavorful tomato sauce and garnished with fresh parmesan cheese, lightly burnt for a satisfying crunch.

Mashed sweet potatoes, whipped together with brown sugar, cream, and butter.

*18% gratuity will be added on to parties of 8 or more*

For dessert, a choice of a silky chocolate cream pie or creamy pumpkin pie topped with "real" whipped cream (is there really a such thing as fake whipped cream? Is it like a Hollywood form of whipped cream, made from 100% natural plastic? or is it perhaps just plain cream disguised as whipped cream? The world may never know)

So ya, that part was pretty fantabulous! Next post i shall tell you about some of the things i'm grateful for! 

Well, I'm going now. Don't worry! I'll be back. Don't cry! I promise I'll be back! O, wait, is that why you're crying? O, well then, I see i'm not wanted. I won't be back then! Fine. I'll just pack up my bags and go. I just need money for a taxi.

Ok, i'm done.


Gobble Gobble.

If i had a turkey
I'd name it Hungary. (get it? Turkey and Hungary are countries, and Hungary sounds like Hungry. Get it now? No? Think about it. It will come. You will get the joke at the most inconvenient time and burst out laughing like a madman. Then people will wonder what the heck is wrong with you and when you tell em the pun, they won't get it until their most inconvenient time, and then a disastrous chain of people laughing at inconvenient times will occur all due to this joke. 

And I will be honored for being such an important part of history. 


smorgan said...

This is a respond to your random idea:

Nice title. Hey, your thanksgiving does sound great minus the problems. My extended family is a bit like that actually, but we usually hide it when it come to family gathering.. It's like a room full of fakes. But hey, that's life I guess.
Guess what? I have a random idea too. Follow my blog and you'll have that cute pic of milky way in my blog...haha..Just kidding. But i would follow yours, then I'll have that wacky pic of me in your blog. Totally being random here.
Rock On!

Nomand in No Man's Land said...

Thanks for the post on my blog :) I LOVE your blog!!!! Its's soooo entertaining :):) And I thought the Hungary joke was very funny, I got it right away :)

James said...

Hmm, I feel bad for your mom. I love u being totally random! I think you should not feel bad, but just realize that ur its ur family's problem, not urs. Ok? Do u? U better or I will gain control over the crows in the world and shoot them at you!

Benji (Rafe) Pacheco said...

"And i don't like telling my mind to shut up cause then my mind gets mad at me and gives me the cold shoulder until I send it flowers."

Wow, that was an exquisite dinner.

Anyways, thanks for posting this, I think I'm gonna create another blog posting up random quotes from people...i guess yours will be first

haha...the word verification is sproxes

Secretarmy.Secretpolice said...

Hello, ma'am. Apparently, you have surveyed my blog, Get Off the Cross... Anyway, I was thinking, given that I have just recently developed a new blog of philosophical musings/rantings, you may be interested in reading that (If you took such a genuine interest in my most recent post).

Natalie! said...

Urgh, family drama doesn't sound like fun! In my family I'm the quietest one cause they're all a bunch of loud crazy Italians, so I pretty much just blend into the background. Luckily we haven't had any big family dramas (lately :P)

But just Thanksgiving with your family still sounds nice! And yes, you always have to include the dogs! Lol (: Cranberry stuffing souds really good! And we have gnochchi a lot too, it's very yummy (:

And I don't think I even *want* to know what they put in whipped cream these days, I think I'm better off not knowing :P

And that turkey name is GENIUS! Haha :D

Natalie! said...

Wow, I spelled gnocchi really wrong.

Oh well, haha (:

And my word verification code is... bralkali! Like broccoli's brother :O

Jaerixon said...

Thank you again for commenting on my blog. I try to get people thinking and questioning and wondering. It is so important, and yet, so scarce. Your words strongly contributed to the content of my post, keep it up :)